Saturday, July 30, 2011

A Little Bit More

So I thought I would explain when I really started getting into weight loss, even now it's a driving factor. I loved vintage and retro stuff. I love it to death, and I love to dance. It's the one thing I can do without looking stupid. Put them together and what do you have?
I love swing dance, I love to watch it, do it, live it. But a main part of it is having a partner and being caught. But I knew that was a long time down the road. But when I finally started swing dance there was a few weeks in and there was a move where the girl would spin and fall back. Your partner would catch you and do this cool pull back move. I loved it but I was terrified.
I was so afraid of falling back and hearing the "oof" or the sharp exhale of air as he struggles to keep me up. Or even he catches me and can't hold me. I was so terrified of the embarrassment of that moment. I felt nauseous and unhappy that I declined the offer to learn the move claiming that I "Wasn't comfortable with the basic moves yet"
I refused to learn something that I would love to learn because of my weight.
That among some other little things is what lead me to everything.

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