Friday, September 30, 2011

Come on BowFlex!

I want the BowFlex to come on!! I need to work out!! I know I know I could be giving some effort before it but I haven't and actually it has been a very enlightening experience. I didn't notice before but even if I wasn't dropping pounds every week yet I was still eating right and keeping up with some kind of exercise that I felt a lot better. Lately I have been breaking out, feeling greasy, not sleeping right, and feel really REALLY heavy all the time. Like literally I feel heavier than last time like I ate a dumbbell or something.
I never thought I would miss working out!! But I do! And I've found that after noon I start to go downhill with my eating, I'll start out great. Eating good portions, good food, but by dinner I'm horking down anything that's set out in front of me. It's bad, I need to get back on plan again. *sigh*


Thursday, September 29, 2011

Bad Dreams and Blur of a Day

Yeah today sucked, well not in "I had a horrible day" but rather in "I'm so flippin tired I'm going to fall over" kind of way. I went to sleep at 11 and woke up at like 10, that should be more than enough time to sleep. Well when you have bad dreams and wake up twice its not such a great sleep. So I wake up and like I feel like a total zombie. All day like "Ahhhhrg what?" then I would fall asleep... no not really but I felt like it.
2 days and counting till BowFlex
Christmas Dress Challenge, on the eating end, it's going great,  but the work out part not so well.
Celtic Festival dress going well!!


Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Just a Bit

Some little things about now. I realized something weird, I keep thinking of my final goal reaching an event, like it's planned and will be coming soon. Like a movie or show. I don't know how to feel about this, am I just waiting for the weight loss to come on its own or am I just excited? I don't even know. Its so strange how you can feel something emotionally yet not know why or what it means.
So yeah that's it, started sewing today, hopefully it will be done by tomorrow night or friday morning. I'll post some picture of that and the festival along with (and don't hold me to this) before pictures for my weight loss. I admire all those who can take their pictures and post them openly. That is one of my biggest fears of weight loss but hey we all have to get over them right? So yeah that's whats up. Lets hope for a good weekend!!
3 days and counting till BowFlex!!


BowFlex Update and Celtic Fair

I have two pieces of news. The first is WE ARE GETTING THE BOWFLEX!! AND I LEARNED HOW TO SPELL IT! So yeah that's awesome. A completely new unused bowflex with the training dvd. All that for free from a friend (Who is totally fit anyways) who doesn't like looking at it in his bedroom anymore. For the most part right now I don't care what my mother thinks about it since mentioning it she went quiet and cranky. So Whatever I will use it. She wants to throw a hissy fit well then *talk to the hand* anywho I'm really excited for it, we're picking it up on Saturday so that is going to be the awesome hugh ass starting day or restarting day for it. Yes I'm moving the restarting date again.
Weight Watchers.... really?
One last think before I get onto more exciting news. A friend well really my Aunt she is so close to us, took this picture of a slice of Weight Watchers bread. So all of those who are on it and it works good for you but I think it's kind of a farce (I love that word!!) I mean this is just hilarious to me.

Anywho lets continue to the next bit of news, I'm going to the Celtic Festival!! I'm so very excited and the best part is I'm going to be dressing up! We bought some fabric today and we're going to work on it all tomorrow. I'll take some pictures after we buy the bodice on Friday since that's one thing we don't want to make ourselves, it's so hard to make one that we might as well leave it to the professionals.
So that's that. Good news all around. Hopefully some more good news later on this week.


Monday, September 26, 2011

BoFlex, Yes or No?

So a friend just offered us a new never been used BoFlex, idk how it's spelled but I'm really thinking about saying yes. It's got these cool ankle things if I remember correct which would help with strengthening my knee. I've been looking for something to help with my workout and what happens? Blessings eh? So I think I'm going to tell my dad yes (since he asked me if I could use it) and we can put it in the sun room! Then I can walk on our treadmill and do the bowflex! I hope this works out.
What do you all think? Should I? Have you ever had a friend use one or used one yourself? If so how was it?
Update later!!

Sucky New Day

So today ended suckishly. It was a great morning, where I actually woke up before noon, I ate a good breakfast (Other than discovering that the bacon was bad X<) then I had a nice lunch at an appropriate time. Then everything went down hill. I made a homemade Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo, the sauce is basically made of milk and fat. I ate so much of that (cause well I love my own food XD). So then I went on a walk came back and did some crunches. I'm finding that by the time that I'm on the floor for my other exercises I really REALLY don't want to do it!! My body is like rebelling against it!. So I think what I'm gonna have to do it do the treadmill and do 2 miles one day then a shat load of calisthenics.  I think I'm just at that point now so yeah!
it's really frustrating.
Let's revisit Mr. Armstrong.
Okay I feel better!!

Sunday, September 25, 2011

A Whole Lot of Lots and a Little Bit of Armstrong

Yes this week has been hectic, and I stress the word week. It's only been a week! I feel like it's been two to three weeks! And I'm actually relieved since I've been teetering on the edge of just failing at my dieting. So I'm back on and tomorrow is going to be a whole new week.
I'm really into this I guess "Restart After A Break" because I didn't 100% quit. I'm revisiting Mr. Armstrong:
I love Armstrong!! He is totally my weight loss icon!! I love him so much!! And for those of you unfamiliar... it's from an anime called Fullmetal Alchemist. And it's awesome.... anyways.
In other news last night I was just getting to bed when from my right hip to my right ankle began to scream at me off and on. I called my mom since I couldn't go to her room since I could barely walk it hurt so much. She came in gave me some icey hot stuff and an ice pack for my knee. Oh and some advil. I pinched a nerve in my lower back. So yeah. That's what's been up!! ttyl

Friday, September 23, 2011

Walk At Home GIVEAWAY!

Hey yall!! So Diaries of a Fat Girl is doing a little giveaway, well not really little and one of the requirements is to blog about it. So here I am!
Here's the info copied from her blog:
  • 2-mile Super Walk DVD; approximately 35-minute run time
  • Eating a Healthy Breakfast DVD; approximately 30-minute run time
  • 3-mile Super Walk DVD; approximately 45-minute run time
  • Eating a Healthy Lunch DVD; approximately 30-minute run time
  • 4-mile Super Walk DVD; approximately 58-minute run time
  • Eating a Healthy Dinner DVD; approximately 30-minute run time
  • Mini Walks DVD; approximately 60-minute run time
  • Two approximately 26"L workout-boosting cables
  • 21-day eating plan

Do at least one of the following to be entered:

  • You must follow my blog Diaries of a Fat Girl (you have to follow to be entered, this is mandatory)
  • Like "Leslie Sansone Walk at Home" on Facebook
  • Blog about this giveaway
  • Comment on this post to let me know you would like to be entered, if you are now following Leslie and if you wrote about this giveaway
The giveaway is open from now until Wednesday September 27 at midnight West Coast time (9pm for the east coasters) 
So go go go!! <3

Bitch Week is being a... Well Bitch

Yeah, that about rounds it all out.
I am having almost everything that comes with Bitch Week. I'm bloating and retaining water like no ones business, I'm having the worst mood swings, I'm fatigued, acne and of course the hall important main point of Bitch Week. It's just so angering!!
I mean I don't have cramps THANK GOD! But really?
Not only are women cursed with acne, cramps, and whatever other shit they can throw at us but they give us mood swings and make us fat...ER! Really? I'm already fat enough now you bloat me and curse me with a bad attitude? Nice. Just nice.
I really don't want to be out in public until this is over but I have to cause of the Draft Horse Classic and my brothers working there.
And of course they have yummy fatty food. Garlic fries, cotton candy, caramel corn, shiz like that. AND THEY HAVE A PIE STAND!! OMFG!! Want want want!! And shaved ice, but thats like low calorie right? It's ice which is frozen water and my favorite bubblegum flavoring!! So yeah that's what's going on.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Christmas Dress Challenge

So thanks to the lovely Poison over at A New Poison, I heard about this lovely little challenge. This would be my first weight loss challenge which is perfect timing. I turned 17 on the 17th and the challenge started yesterday, a perfect time to start over. So the rules are simple.
1. Pick a dress in the size of your goal if your an XL and want to be a M (like me) then pick a dress in said size.
2. Set s healthy caloric intake
3. Exercise at least 3x a week
4. Drink water
Then post a first post with your current size, a picture of your dress (on the rack, at home or off the internet depending on whether you've bought it or not) weight and your goal.
I did not create this all the credit goes to Sarah at Fat So Sarah: A Weight Loss Journey.
So here's my standing.
Current weight: 210
Current size: L/XL
Goal size: M
Click Me!
So it won't let me copy the picture so yeah XD click above
Tell Poison SARAH you are joining and link her your first post!

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Peanut Butter and Pickles

Must be Bitch Week again!!

Beautiful Birthday

I had an A-MAZ-ING birthday with mah fam. And not a MFP, measuring tape, or scale in site!! And dammit it was such a fabulous time!! I felt normal and not stressed. It was like a totally new life. I can't wait till the day I don't have to pour over this shit.

Friday, September 16, 2011

17th Birthday!!

Is tomorrow and what am I doing for my birthday wish. NOTHING! Oh yeah! NO calorie counting, no exercising, and NO weighing in!! Yaaaay! Yay for slacking on my birthday!!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Shit's hit the fan

And I really hate it.
I mean what the fuck did we do wrong? scuse de french but seriously!
It seems God, Fate or whoever the Hell runs this place is pissed at us or something and wants us to suffer. I really feel that way. I've live YEARS with this kind of shit and really it hasn't gotten better. Yes I have had a lot of blessings but the cons seem to outweigh the pros. It really is starting to make me feel like we are just stupid insignificant specs that don't deserve anything! I am so determined to get out of high school  and make money and a name for myself so that I can give whoever is trying to keep me and my family down the big fat finger. Sorry but that's how I feel right now and I'm working on not apologizing for what I feel or who I am. So there.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Awesome Day

I had an awesome day today, I got to feel the love from my two teachers. I had come out of the bathroom at school and they were telling eachother that
"Cassie is awesome!" now I was totally oblivious cause there's another girl named Cassie but then they called me over and told me that I was awesome and talented and what not and it was the best feeling ever for me. It was crazy and I was so honored to have people think of me like that. Then I had to do like a review of people's stories in creative writing, two stories actually and so the two I was reviewing reviewed mine and each others. They liked my work, that was so amazing for me cause I just thought my mom and teacher like it, that's in no one outside of my little bubble will like it blah blah blah but they did! Someone I barely knew liked my work!! Yay!! I know that being an author is what I'm meant to do and the haters can hate but there are some that like my work!! Yay!!

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Great Great Day!

So I was home alone for the night since my family went camping, I didn't sleep very well and didn't get out of bed until noon, but when I got up I had a fiber one chewy bar and then I walked 7/10ths of a mile on the dreadmill then I showered and ate breakfast. I felt so proud of myself!! I'm going to go for an actual walk tonight since it's so nice outside!! It is cloudy and cool, and NOT HUMID! Which means it's so freaking awesome outside. SO I'm going to take the small doggy out (He freaking loves his walks! He gets so excited!) and go around the neighborhood, I'm not going to let the numbers get me down this time. My mom said that for a few weeks instead of weighing in we'll measure in. It's not as accurate for me but we'll see what the numbers say in a few weeks. Let's hope their good! I'm also detoxing from soda, I haven't had one in two days which is good, I'm having tea instead which is nice.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Muscle.... Riiiiight

So yeah I gained 1.1 pound. Really? Fudge!!! My mom says her and dad can see it but of course I can't she also says its muscle, and I did just start doing weights but I don't completely know if 4 lbs over 2 weeks is all muscle. I have been a little off but.... 4 lbs?
Ugh yeah so it hasn't been good but I'm trying. I think soda was also a contributing factor. But I have lost inches. At least from my first 226 weight, I was 46 inches now I'm 42 (at night) or 40 (in the morning) so I guess that's positive right?

Friday, September 9, 2011


So my Birthday is only about a week away and today I went to walmart with my mom, it wasn't really birthday shopping but I got a few little things. Well technically I didn't "get anything" wink wink nudge nudge. But I got some replacement make up and stuff. But I walked a lot then I went for a walk at home in the steamer that was the outside world. Then I did my workout and now I'm going to go drink some magic drank that helps me sleep. night night.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Didn't Post

Most Likely over ate. Shit.
So today has been good so far, only had a sandwich and a slice of lemon bread. But I think I'm having pizza for dinner so that'll be s dump on my diet oh and guess what! No walk! Yeah No walk! Know why? Cause we have to truck out to a freaking hell hole on earth for a long ass promotion for my sister. Not that I don't love my sister and am glad shes ranking up and all that shiz but I really don't want to go out there. Really don't.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

I've Found It!

The reason I'm a shitty weight loser! I just realized that When I stop posting on my blog I put on weight!! When I don't have to answer to someone (in this case something) I eat and I don't give a shit. So like those 3 pounds really really put my down. It's amazing how three measly pounds, a number could completely drag me down to the gates of Hell. Well I'm back again and I'm determined to get those lbs back off! Years from now when I'm successful and skinny and rocking the world I can look back at these and go "Wow, I remember when I used to feel like that,"
To round it all off, I need to add posting on my blog to my dayly list. Answer to someone. Record. Do it. Loose those lousy pounds!!

Monday, September 5, 2011

Sorry Sorry Sorry!!

To all those who are visiting I probably just totally botched my first impression which is why I'm writing this sorry note. Weight loss is a pain in the ass but that doesn't give me the right to totally blow up. I have a tendency of exploding with anger, sadness, pain, happiness, and excitement without thinking before doing so. Writing and drawing is my main outlet for these emotions and sometimes I don't know when to hold back and when to let it out. So again I'm sorry for my cursing and bad attitude, it's so weird how a number on a scale can get me so pissed! And after thinking about it for a bit I realized that it really wasn't that much compared to all that I've lost. I just need to work twice as hard to loose this weight.
Once more I am sorry and I will be more positive and try not to blow up.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Hello Again

Yeah I'm here again my life has been totally thrown off with our houses owner coming to town. We have to clean the house like crazy so I haven't been going on my walks. Sooooo I've been doing my sit ups and shit. Also I filled a laundry detergent bottle with water to I guess.... simulate a weight. Yeah I'm "Toning" my arms for basically free.
So yeah I need to get back on track, not the track you might think though. I've been eating right and trying to exercise as much as I can I just need sleeping and homework to be worked into my sched.

Thursday, September 1, 2011


YAAAAAY!! I'm so excited!
So it's that time again!! Time to be a year older! I hope I can keep my enthusiasm of birthdays till the day I die!!
Another unfortunate occurrence of September is 9/11.
I saw a beautiful programs (one of the ones they have on the many channels) and I cried today.
Probably cause I can see the spirits standing there, waiting. It's so heartbreaking yet powerful and uplifting.
This kind of sucks as a 50th post